Monday, July 4, 2011

Happy Fourth of July!

Happy Independence Day, fellow Americans, and others who choose to celebrate, as I do, yet another year of no alien invasions.

I am spending my day making ridiculous amounts of food for 3 people and hiding from fireworks.

I really like fireworks, from afar, but the following excerpt from a conversation with my friend the other day will illustrate my main issue:

Of course, I had to clarify:

Friend: Sparklers are my favorite part of the 4th of July!
Me: I like sparklers from a safe distance.... like 15-20 feet.
Friend: Awwwww... did you have a bad experience with them?
Me: No... I just don't like being set on fire. I learned in "Trees, Conservations and People" in college that sparks cause fire.
Friend: ...I've never been set on fire in the 20-ish years I've played with sparklers...
Me: That is not to say I have ever been set on fire... that I can recall... I just would like very much to avoid it.
Friend: Sparklers are totes harmless if respected.
Me: I respect them, by staying 15-20 feet away from them.

In actuality, I was once singed by fireworks in a college homecoming display gone awry, at Gator Growl (Go Gators, and take your fiery death sticks with you) and as pretty as fireworks are, I am more than happy to enjoy them from far far away.


  1. Sparklers are fun! I love them! I'm from Canada but we had sparklers on Canada Day!

  2. yeah, i'm w/ you about the distance from sparklers, most of the time. sometimes it is fun, tho! : )

  3. I've never known anyone else who hates firecrackers and sparklers like I do! (I'm assuming you would also keep your distance from other firecrackers, too...?) I like the pretty high-up-in-the-night-sky kind (that some very careful man on a far away barge is in charge of), but I hate the rest with a fearful passion. Yay, America, but can we celebrate without matches?

  4. Mrs. Chandler, it goes without saying, totally hate all firecrackers too!

  5. OMG love fireworks, we just celebrated Canada Day (Aboot time, eh!) and we were graced with the visit of Prince William and Kate and had a very nice display of fireworks on July 1st! The city was nuuuts!!

    Happy Independance Day!!

  6. I love sparklers, but I am always afraid they'll get me, so I walk around like a moron with my arms stretched as far from me as possible, trying to make it look like I'm actually doing something cool with them.

    No one ever believes it...

  7. When I was about three my parents took me to the big fireworks display that the city puts on at our fairgrounds. the big booming fireworks, and the ash that fell a few seconds later scared me very badly, so my mom gave me a blanket to hide under. right about the time my mom was insisting that it was impossible for any of the ashes to be hot enough to land on me and catch fire, a chunk of firework landed on me and caught the blanket on fire. Your fear and hatred is totally justified!!!! I like to celebrate no-alien-invasions-this-year day by making tons of food and eating it with friends in the safe afternoon and then hiding under my bed with my fire extinguisher close at hand all night long!

  8. I have the same exact stance on fireworks. Yay us!

  9. amazing! yeah those images of light! so beautiful!
    bring the light to me here:
    Models From The Earth

  10. Ooh! I share your fear of explosives. That's right. Sparklers are just watered-down explosives. Magnesium is not your friend. At-home fire crackers actually make my teeth hurt. No joke. Ok. So I have bad teeth. But still and all. They suck. Hooray for professionally executed pyrotechnics!

  11. I do enjoy things more when I'm not in danger of being harmed by them...unfortunately, this renders the oven quite the conundrum.


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