Many years ago, I made a resolution not to make any more resolutions, and I've stuck to it since. It is a shame, because I am really good at sticking to resolutions. For example, I resolved, after breaking up with Evil Mike never to date anyone, ever again, who I did not find at least reasonably attractive upon first seeing them. That worked out well for me since my husband is pretty cute.
I think if I were to make resolutions, it would only be right for them to be ridiculous and super easy. Like:
or perhaps:
I resolve to annoy celebrities on twitter until one of them finally acknowledges me as awesome OR blocks me.
Resolving not to do things seems like a drag. I have enough opportunities to be disappointed in myself naturally (still neurotic), I don't need to manufacture any more that I then declare publicly, giving other people the opportunity to be disappointed in me too. I think if you are gonna set up rules for yourself, they should make you happy, not miserable. So if you are still into resolving stuff, go easy on yourself, and please consider making at least one funny/easy resolution so you can feel like a success and add some laughter to your life... and then tell me about it so I can laugh too.
And hey, because I am a nerd and can't help myself, SEE YOU NEXT YEAR! =P
I am almost physically incapable of interacting with syrup without getting some in my hair, eyebrows, arm hair, etc.
I didn't even consume any syrup today. I simply poured a tiny bit onto pancakes my nephew was eating for lunch and I ended up with a piece of crumpled straw wrapper coated in strawberry syrup stuck to the side of my head.
I am fairly certain other people don't have this problem.
In my estimation, the only thing that mint really goes well with is chocolate. Why then, does the dental care industry insist on making mouth products that are supposed to be used before or around eating, out of the one flavoring agent that makes all other things taste HORRIBLE?!
Really, mint doesn't play well with others. Especially not spearmint! Peppermint, it's okay, since it gets to represent a major holiday it seems to have a better attitude towards other foods, but for the most part, mints are terrible terrible flavor collaborators.
My point is, I really think that more people would brush their teeth upon waking if it wasn't going to make drinking their morning orange juice into an experience of taste torture.
The problem is to find a flavor that is palatable with most things, doesn't leave a terrible aftertaste, and isn't so bizarre as to turn the consumer off to buying it.
My first thought, as it usually is, was BACON! It is the perfect flavor, but alas, probably not going to make for the freshest breath. Gonna need to go with something sweet. Then I thought waffles, mmm buttery syrupy waffles. Might be a hard flavor to recreate.
Perhaps the solution is orange juice flavored toothpaste. And none of this "orange mint" that was tried, that just makes the prospect of toothbrushing, itself, torturous. I mean, people like orange juice, right? It is refreshing, delicious, and full of vitamin C. I'd be willing to try it.
Perhaps a line of drink flavored toothpastes would be best for all day brushing. Orange juice, lemonade, merlot wine, vodka...
