Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Or I could go to Australia...

I hate doing dishes.

And I hate doing dishes mostly because I am incapable of doing them without incurring the wrath of the sink.
By this I mean, dishes, quite clearly, hate me as much as I hate them.
I know this because I cannot get away from a sink of soiled bowls, utensils, plates, pots or pans without somehow spraying the entire kitchen with water, or soaking the front of my shirt and pants in a tell-tale oblong "splash of shame."



Now I have been told that, apparently, it is possible to wash dishes without looking like you've been visiting Sea World, and I've tried to thwart the soggy wrath with a kitchen towel placed on the edge of the sink, but then, I manage to soak the towel and then myself, or at the very least, I manage to place an ice cream scoop under the faucet, which results in spraying my entire shirt, sleeves, face, and feet because of course, I am freaking out that I am being dowsed with tepid sink water, and  I can't figure out to turn down the water pressure instead of quickly moving the concave surface while water ricochets everywhere.
It must be noted as well, that I have the keen ability to fill my sleeves with water, which seems like something only an idiot would do, but... I seem to be an idiot.

And just last night, I realized, apparently, I'm allergic to dish soap, or at least the ridiculously cheap crap that we buy, so getting soaked also means looking like I have leprosy in the places where the soapy water comes in contact with my skin for more than a few seconds.

I was hoping that my histamine reaction to dishes would get me out of having to do them, but no... of course they make hypoallergenic soap... bastards!

And yes, I know they make dishwashers to do dishes, but I have a tiny kitchen and a tiny counter top dishwasher, and all that it fits are plates and bowls, which are, of course, the easiest things to wash by hand.


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Remember, today is the last day to buy May's Limited Edition Llama sticker. They won't be available tomorrow!

And I made another dress-up game (with tutorial on how to do dress-up games all day Saturday) on my art blarg that features  the Nacho Dress.  It is NSFW unless you get the clothes on the underwear clad JRose figure fast. =P   Go there to dress me up!

9 comments:

  1. why the hell do you have a tag for Amanda Palmer? That was so random to me lol.

    Hmmm...May I suggest a dish washing monkey? They're cute and trainable!

    (Love the splash zone poster by the way, reminds me of amusement parks. teehee!)

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  2. They need to get on top of paper/disposable frying pans and sauce pots!

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  3. I know what you mean. I have to put a towel on the floor by the sink because I splash water all over.

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  4. OH MY GOD LET'S START A "I Hate Washing Dishes" FAN (or rather...Hate?) CLUB PLEASE.

    Seriously though, I completely understand everything here. It feels like I just went swimming after washing dishes, and my hands always get super red and irritated from the soap and alternating between hot and cold water.

    Washing dishes is my most disliked (understatement) chore even though it must be done in the end.

    ~TRA

    http://xtheredangelx.blogspot.com

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  5. I always end up doing angry dishwashing.

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  6. I also soak the shit out of myself when doing dishes. I also soak myself while washing Layla too. I also can't cook without getting half the ingredients all over myself. And I can't use flour without spreading it all over the counter tops, floor, ceiling, and myself. Yay for the functionally challenged! :D

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  7. I would join the hate for washing dishes club. I always get a oil stains on my clothes but I refuse to wear an apron.

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