A Farewell to my Stevie Cat (and an important PSA)

After five and a half years of being my best friend, our kitty, Señor Stevie Nicks, succumbed to heart disease*.

If I had known it was coming I would have taken the time to have a few more days with him to do all the lovey things people do:

Chasing butterflies

Spinning in a field of flowers

 

Drinking milkshakes together

Going for boat rides in Central Park

Snuggling at home

   

But he was sick... and scared, and we lost him so suddenly. He was barely showing any signs of illness, still eating and playful, sleeping with his butt in our faces, drinking milkshakes, and rowing boats, but then he was gone just moments after getting him to the vet, leaving me and Mike shocked and devastated. I don't know how I have managed my whole life to avoid the up-close death of a pet with as many as I've had. It's a really horrible concept and I don't know who came up with it but I would like to unsubscribe, RIGHT NOW.  In the end, I am glad he chose us and we did everything we could to give him the best life possible. I love him so much and I will never forget my sweet Stevie cat.

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*Stevie died of cardiac arrest from an enlarged heart. He had a grain allergy, to the point that he couldn't even eat poultry that was fed grain or he would itch terribly and barf/poop/gain lots of weight. We found him a grain-free food that had all the nutrition he needed to keep him healthy, in theory. Unfortunately, I am finding now, much too late, that grain-free pet food currently on the market seems to contain some ingredient that might interfere with taurine uptake, which cats (and dogs) need to avoid heart damage. The FDA is investigating this, but there are things you can do in the meantime.

Please, if you are feeding your pet a grain-free diet have their taurine levels tested IMMEDIATELY (or as soon as you can afford to).

If they don't have allergies, stop feeding them a commercial grain-free diet. If they do, please, get their taurine tested and consult with a vet on how best to proceed. Once they have symptoms, which, in Stevie's case was only abdominal breathing, it is often too late, but the damage can be reversed if it is caught early enough with taurine supplementation. No one should go through what we're going through now, losing our pet so young, so please, share this information so every cat lives long enough to replace us as the dominant species on the planet.

Dead, dead, deadski.

My best friend of 14 years died in November. She was hilarious and smart and beautiful and a fantastic writer and it's really hard living without her. It's probably harder for her eight year old daughter who she left behind while she lingered in a coma for 6 months, while we all waited, some with more hope than others, to see if she would finally wake up. But damn it, it's hard for me.

When I think of her being gone, I think, "my Tracey is dead," but when I mention it elsewhere in the world, I change it to, "she passed away," or she "succumbed to her illness" or some other euphemism, not because I need to say it, but because I think people will somehow think I'm a jerk for plainly stating she is no longer alive.

I never hear anyone else using dead in conjunction with the death of a loved one. Does everyone else want to use it, but feel the same as I do? Like they have to make it into a poem to talk about it? Like other people might break, or think you just don't care if you plainly say, "Tracey died"?

Is it the proximity of the death? My previous best friend, Aimee, died 10 years ago, (I might add at this point, I'm a little afraid to claim another best friend as this seems to be a trend), and saying, "My friend died 10 years ago" doesn't feel quite as jarring. Does the fact that Tracey just fell through the veil (to borrow from the imagery of Harry Potter, which we both loved), make it seem that she could be right back if only I don't make it plain to others where she is? Is saying "she's dead" like a lock that keeps her trapped in the next world, where as "she passed away" allows for her to change her mind and pop back in, like she went out to smoke a cigarette with Jesus and changed her mind?

My Tracey is dead. She died because of the weird autoimmune disease we both have (had?) and I miss her every day. I miss her when I watch Seinfeld and when I read Stephen King books, and when I see the previews for the new Harry Potter movie that she'll never see unless a next world actually exists and has the same entertainment offerings as ours. I love her, and I always will, and I hate feeling that I have to compose a poem to lessen the sorrow of her loss for other people every time I want to mention that I had a friend and I don't any more.

No Snuggles for You!

Stevie WILL NOT cuddle with me like a snuggly kitty... unless I have been asleep for several hours. Then he wants to lay up against my face/chest and nuzzle, but just until I wake up completely and think, "Aw, he's snuggling," then he gets up and leaves.

So, in short, I think my cat might be a snuggling version of a necrophiliac.

Pintester Movement: That's Not A Moon!

It is also not a dented flamboyant golf ball though it looks like one of those, too.

So, I am back, thanks to Sonja Foust's Pintester Movement again. She really does a good job of getting me to post once a month. This time, we're all making ornaments (serious, go look at all the awesome ornaments in the links!), and I wanted to try out this awesome Star Wars Disco Death Star that I found on Pinterest.

This picture is not mine. This is what it should look like. This is awesome. 

It should be noted that there are no square sequins in all of Montana... in fact, there are hardly any sequins at all. I guess when you live in a place where eagles pick up baby deer and fling them at power lines, sequining shit is not a priority. After checking every other store in town, I finally found round silver sequins and since we are pintesting here, I figured, 'fuck it, that will do.'

Also, I don't know if this phenomenon is widespread but it seems that Montana thinks that Styrofoam is made out of unicorn spleens, because they are seriously pricey here. This tutorial was all, "under 5 dollars" and I was all, "bullshit!" So my ball is much smaller than their ball because I am cheap, and I wasn't paying over 6 dollars for a stupid ball, though I suppose it will never decompose, so maybe I'm supposed to be paying for longevity.

Anyway, once I started the project, it was pretty easy. Took me about 2 hours to finish it while not really paying attention to a football game on TV. I was kinda of tired of being covered in glue by the end of it, and of repositioning sequins that my giant clumsy fingers knocked out of place.

It doesn't look like the Death Star really because round sequins are built to reflect light everywhere, so it just looks like a gaudy silver ball really, but I am sure that if I tell everyone what it is when I put it in my tree, they will be able to see it... if they squint.

And, I don't really like sucking at things so I made another ornament to show that I really am good at things when I am given the correct supplies. This one is from the following tutorial I found on Pinterest, which I used as an inspiration, again, because I couldn't find exactly what it called for and these bitchin' hollow glass globes were on sale at our fancy craft store.

Here are their versions:

source

And here is mine:

TOO SOON!

I needle felted the landscape from polyfill fiber and various colored wool, and the T-Rex came from our local animal feed/farming store. I have no idea why they have tiny dinosaurs in the farm store, but I am glad they do, because, while it is insensitive to dinosaurs, apocalyptic dino deaths are one of my favorite art subjects. Should I find the appropriate medium before Christmas, I may even glaze the back of this with reds and orange to really drive home the "imminent death" thing.

As a reminder, if you are sending Cheeseblarg's tree an ornament (and thank you to those who already have, they are all AWESOME), they should be to me by the 21st (if it is a day or two late, I'll cope, but I do need time to get them photographed and coded). I can't wait to see all the ones that are on their way! You guys are super awesome!

And while I am showing off my needle felting, though it has absolutely nothing to do with the Pintester Movement, this is still my blarg, and I can show off why I haven't been entertaining y'all as frequently. Part of it is getting Hanukkah presents ready for you guys (Starting Thanksgiving night, there will be daily posts coming for eight whole days), but mostly, I have been stabbing things and making money doing so to replace my husband's lost unemployment.

If you are interested in buying a felt from me, I have the white and black Dalek on Etsy (the rest have been sold), and I am happy to make almost any felt sculpture that someone is willing to pay for (unless it is a human baby) as long as you are willing to wait a week or so for it to be done. Remember, these are not sewn pieces, they are all stabbed and are solid (but soft). They are art pieces, and not really suitable for playing with, because tugging can pull the wool out of place. If you're interested, I can only manage about 10 of them before it becomes too late for gifting for Christmas, so feel free to contact me at cheeseblarg at live dot com so I can get a piece done for you. Fair warning, I am working at 15 bucks an hour on these, and most take me several hours to do, but as you can see, they are pretty damned awesome.

And a pinch to grow an inch!

Hey! Hey guys!

In exactly ONE MONTH, guess what!!!

No... guess again.
. . .

Damn it, fine.

IT WILL BE MY BIRTHDAY!!!

I wanted to give you advance warning so that you could all get together and plan me the best internet surprise party EVAR.  I'll go along thinking, 'they've all forgotten, no one's said a thing about it at all,' but then POW, you'll all jump out and scream "SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!" and then I will most likely have a heart attack, which would be really sad... but wouldn't you be quite startled if approximately 1200 people all jumped out at you at the same time? That shit is scary.  Don't do that!

And you really couldn't keep it a secret anyway.  I would be driven to google "Surprise party for JRose" every day, because someone will make some comment somewhere and I would KNOW, just KNOW what was going on, and my detective nature will ruin it all. I'm an asshole like that.

But other than Halloween, birthdays are my favorite holidays. What's better than a day ALL FOR ME ONE SPECIAL PERSON!?  No one in my family really made a big deal about major holidays growing up, but my parents threw my sister and me big theme birthday parties every year that were totally bitchin'. AND they let us have boy/girl sleepovers, in high school, so yeah.

 I know you are thinking to yourself now, 'You've convinced me, your birthday is super important, but what should I get you!?' because like me, you are desperate for love and attention thoughtful and generous. And to that I say, "You don't have to get me a damned thing... unless you want to..." and then I will take anything that wasn't rubbed on a dead body OR poop and that doesn't contain something that will surely cause me some sort of physical harm. No zombie viruses, no anthrax, no ground glass, and though I appreciate the thought, no bodily fluids.

That may not help, but clearly you have been reading my blarg so you should have a slight idea of things that I like.

Llamas, narwhals, goats, dinosaurs, Back to the Future, Ghostbusters, R2-D2 (and Star Wars), Data (and Star Trek), Harry Potter, Portal, zombies, bacon, candy (that doesn't taste like bacon), stickers, felt barrettes, large stacks of cash and gift cards, diamonds, unicorn shaped jumbo jets, keys to a shiny new Australia.... or a mash up of any of the above.

Here is some examples of things I think are awesome:

Awesome Dino Felt Barrette

Interesting fact- I always draw myself mirrored. I actually wear my barrettes on the right side. 

R2D2 felted charm

Portal Weighted Companion Cube Pendant

Any of these things from my wishlist on ThinkGeek.com

 

And Archie McPhee is always fun:

 I also collect metal lunchboxes, hand-painted plastic snowdomes, and mold-o-rama figurines and have a wishlist at amazon.com.

And one of my favorite birthday songs, to get us all in the mood!

p.s. You are totally expected to save birthday wishes for my actual birthday. I mean, you can give them now but they don't actually count until 4:04 am EST October 2nd.


ETA- Awesome reader Ronja has created a facebook birthday party event. I think it maybe be a surprise, but I somehow figured it out. =P

Bring out your dead!

I tried to fix my camera and ended up killing it.
I am usually good at everything and can fix anything given basic instructions, but, I might as well have had hammers for hands when attempting this repair.

I have a newfound respect for camera repair people because, while I did manage to avoid breaking down into to tears while trying, for 30 minutes, to get the 3rd of 5 orange cables back into its tiny silver toothed home after possibly successfully replacing the LCD screen (that I broke by dropping it), I did not avoid yelling "GET IN YOUR HOME!!!!!!!!!!!! AUGH!!!" or wishing everything and everyone dead in exchange for it JUST GETTING IN THERE, about the time when the black bar that snuggly holds the evil orange cable in place snapped off in my hand (or well, at the end of my finger because it was not even as wide as my finger and about the width of three hairs- and it was the biggest of the 5) and then snapped in half after that, as I delicately tried to put in back in to the almost microscopic hole it popped out of on my 40th attempt to get the damned cable back in.

So my adorable pink camera who served me well for almost 5 years is caput.  My friend was kind enough to procure me a new one so I could continue the photographic work I was doing with the now-dead one (see my cooking site), but I would like to be able to pay him back for it, so if anyone needs some llamas drawn for them (and is willing to exchange monetary credits for said drawing), let me know.


AND, a challenge.  Peep horror movie scenes… see Cheeseblarg’s Facebook Page for details!

A Girl and her Bunny.

My family (and I, obviously) lived in Southern California when I was a wee one. Occasionally we would take trips up into the mountains between Oceanside and Ramona.  And of course, each trip has a fairly horrific story about me attached to it.

My memory doesn't separate any of the stories, but I have been assured that there were three different occasions, so for now, you only get to hear one of them-- you would have thought that they would have learned to stop taking me up into the damned mountains though.

This story, in particular, occurred on the first trip we made. While driving happily along, as we made our ascent up the mountain, I called out to my parents, begging them to pull over and stop the car.  Watching out the window, I  had seen a very fluffy rabbit on the side of the road that I desperately wanted as a pet.  They very kindly and patiently explained to me that the bunny wasn't sleeping.  The very bloated bunny was, in fact, very dead, which meant I really didn't want it.
"But, I want a dead bunny for a pet!" I told them eagerly.
"Why?" They asked with concern.
"Because I can hug it and it won't run away!"
 Which makes some sort of sense, I guess, but is a little morbid for a 4 year old.  I suppose I didn't quite grasp the concept of decomposition.

Thankfully, they did not allow me to have the dead bunny, but they did get me a rabbit pelt, which was probably the safest alternative to keep me from becoming a serial killer.