New Things I Learned This Week - Episode 1

I wanted to share with you, each Thursday, new things I learned during the week. I thought it might be fun, and according to my long ago Facebook poll, some of you agree, but thankfully I am in charge of what gets posted here, so even if you were all, " NO WAY! That sounds boring!" I would probably still post it if it made me laugh.

So here are a few new things I learned this week:

Despite thinking I was completely useless at first person shooters, because of that one time that I turned on my roommate's Xbox to try playing Halo while he wasn't home and was shot repeatedly in the head within seconds of spawning, I learned, playing Bioshock Infinite, (because my husband was tired of me nagging him to check garbage cans while he was playing and handed over the controller) that I am actually pretty good at video games... unless there are 8 people shooting me from different directions, and one of them seems to be Fire Marshal Bill who is throwing large lava rocks at me. Then I just do a lot of yelling of "OMG STOP SHOOTING ME!" and cry while getting killed a lot.

Also, it is totally acceptable to eat cotton candy that has been in a dead man's pocket.

I highly recommend Bioshock Infinite though. It stands alone well, so you don't HAVE to have played the other two games (though they are awesome also, so you should), and it is just stunning, visually, and so much fun... though the last battle took me a million tries, since it goes from relatively easy -- on the easiest setting-- to WELL THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY in the last battle. If you utilize your many different powers correctly, it is completely doable... demonstrated by the fact that I did it, finally (after looking up helpful hints).

This is the trailer, where you can see how beautiful it is, but be warned, there is a slight amount of gore in it... and know that I chose the trailer with the least spoilery stuff in it:

On to the next thing I learned:

Spiders pee-poop. Also, spider pee, not flammable.

Also, I was reminded that without the aid of spell check, I am apparently unable to spell the word flammable.


New thing trice:

We now have to worry about an epidemic of kitten perpetrated nipple maulings. So much so that I was able to use this card I made for Jen Yates for my friend, comedian Jen Kober, only a few days later.

Feel free to use it, should you know someone who is impacted by this horrifying kitten trend.

And finally:

Despite a hidden desire to kick/punch a punching bag, which was realized when watching some stupid banking commercial, it would make me feel bad for abusing an inanimate object; this feels like it would be much more likely:

Extra points if you recognize the room I am reading to the punching bag in... extra extra points if you verify your knowledge by "shouting" quotes.

It's Thanksgiving!

So I have heard many people complaining that Christmas music starts playing everywhere immediately after Halloween and that this is, apparently, a problem.

I shit you not, I almost cried in a grocery story today after hearing a little kid caroling everyone as her mother pushed her along.  Actually, maybe it was her aunt, because mom's get embarrassed easier than aunts and try to shut things like that down.

Anyway, I digress, I know a lot of people who are Grinchier than I am, and I'm a Jew, so maybe the novelty just hasn't worn off for me yet, but yeah, apparently Christmas songs in November is incredibly stressing to some of you guys.

I figured out why this is. Not why it bothers people, but why it starts right after Halloween. There is NO popular Thanksgiving music. I was telling Dr. Pants this the other day, suggesting that they crank out some awesome turkey tunes, but someone else beat them to it.

Remember everyone's favorite FUN FUN FUN FUN song.
The maker of "Friday" (the song, not the movie), has a new song for Thanksgiving... because no one else did it first. And to that, I say SHAME ON YOU, musicians, shame on all of you...

And also, I want someone to bring ribs to my house for Thanksgiving now.

there's a video here, RSS feeders

It is somehow LEAGUES worse than "Friday" and it prompted me to write my own Thanksgiving song, which I think is only 45% as annoying and way more endearing. It is also titled "It's Thanksgiving!"

there is also a video here... come to the site to watch it!

Dr. Pants- Watching the World End : A Review... kinda.

Approximately 2 weeks ago, some version of this conversation happened:

I also informed the awesome Dr. Pants that I am terrible at reviewing stuff and fail, often, at doing things on time, despite best intentions. However, my desire to not embarrass myself by looking like some flighty jerk outweighed my overwhelming need to not prioritize things that I am not paid to do (because I am not being paid for this review, or compensated in any way, I really am doing it because their rocking concert in The Bloggess' bathroom turned me into a fan, and because I was assured that drawing songs wasn't a cop out) so here we go... BEFORE DEADLINE, BITCHES!

Watching the World End is Dr. Pants' new EP, scheduled for release on April 28, at which time you should totally go and buy the hell out of it. The EP is the third of a four-part series entitled THE TRIP.

The album is fun and funny, a mixture of funk and nerdy rock.  It consists of 6 songs, all of which I illustrated, and all of which are worth listening to. I know that doesn't sound like much of a recommendation, but as I advised, I suck at reviewing and when I say something is worth listening to, it means it is actually enjoyable and good.  Now on to my illustrations!

Robot Spiders 

This is by far my favorite song on the album because the story it tells is so much fun. Don't even take my word for it, listen for yourself!

Collections

This song has nothing to do with cats, I don't think, as it is an instrumental. I just wanted a reason to draw cat buttholes since all the cool bloggers feature cat buttholes and it makes them famous. Also, I like the idea of a living collection, because it is awful, just awful. Unless you collect cats, in which case, I don't mean to insult you, but really... there might be something wrong with you.

No Funkies

I am reminded of the hip coffee culture in my college town of Gainesville, FL listening to this song, for some reason.  It is entirely funky and so catchy I find myself singing it randomly. "We don't want no funkies in here."

Natalie

Very reminiscent of Weezer, this song is, and again, catchy. It also reminds me of the 80s, probably because it stirs up my first feelings of unrequited love when, in 6th grade, I was sitting and in my closet talking to Jorge Herrera on my cheeseburger phone and I said "Oh Jorge, I like you so much, I would do anything for you!" and he said "Oh really, well, could you tell Susan that I like her!" Susan was my best friend. I said "Ok..." and then hung up and cried for a while. This song would have made me feel better at the time. Especially if I had sung it while punching Jorge in the face.

Dog -> Hurricane

There are times when the melodies in this song remind me of Ween, and that is a good thing in my book. It waxes philosophic on the Butterfly Effect in true nerd style, starting at the title of the song that uses mathematical notation, and it makes me smile.  Especially when picturing a villainous dog. I know, these damned descriptions will do you no good unless you hear the songs.  That is the point. LISTEN TO THE SONGS... when they are available, of course. April 28th!

I Am Yours

This is a sweet and intimate upbeat love song and I am a jackass for illustrating it as I do with Spiderman and Harry Potter (complete with Triwizard Tournament Trophy), but it should not be news that I am a jackass.

So there you go. I appreciate being given the chance by Dr. Pants to share this music with you guys, and I hope that you will listen to the album when it comes out and you will enjoy it as much as I did. Also, I'd like a Robot Spider when available, guys. You know where to reach me for shipping details.

2nd Annual Cheeseblarg Peeps Diorama Challenge- VIDEO GAMES!

Last year was our first Annual Peeps Diorama Challenge here at da Cheeseblarg.  Unlike normal Peeps contests, this one is judged well AFTER Easter so that we can all take advantage of half-priced candy, which is a long-held Jewish tradition (in my household, at least).

This year, we continue that tradition with:

Your challenge, should you choose to accept it (and you should), is to create a diorama (aka a miniature scene) depicting the VIDEO GAME of your choice utilizing Marshmallow Peeps (of any sort). Upload your creation to Cheeseblarg's facebook page or send it to me on twitter OR place a link to your blog (with your entry) in the comments. 

You have until April 22nd at which time, the AWESOME nerd band from Oklahoma,  Dr. Pants (as seen in The Bloggess' bathroom), will be judging your entries and picking the winner.

What does the winner get?! Well, at this point, they get a used DVD copy of Pinata: Survival Island and some dryer lint, but I have and will continue to look for better prizes.* BUT beyond that, you also get your artistry judged by awesome people and all entries will be displayed here on the blarg and on Pinterest.

Examples from last year's contest:

by Kimberly Bowers

By Rhea Blackthorne

by Me!

*If you have any video game related prizes or gift cards that you are willing and able to donate to the cause, please let me know. I will plug the hell out of you for helping. Thanks!