2nd Annual Cheeseblarg Peeps Diorama Challenge- VIDEO GAMES!

Last year was our first Annual Peeps Diorama Challenge here at da Cheeseblarg.  Unlike normal Peeps contests, this one is judged well AFTER Easter so that we can all take advantage of half-priced candy, which is a long-held Jewish tradition (in my household, at least).

This year, we continue that tradition with:

Your challenge, should you choose to accept it (and you should), is to create a diorama (aka a miniature scene) depicting the VIDEO GAME of your choice utilizing Marshmallow Peeps (of any sort). Upload your creation to Cheeseblarg's facebook page or send it to me on twitter OR place a link to your blog (with your entry) in the comments. 

You have until April 22nd at which time, the AWESOME nerd band from Oklahoma,  Dr. Pants (as seen in The Bloggess' bathroom), will be judging your entries and picking the winner.

What does the winner get?! Well, at this point, they get a used DVD copy of Pinata: Survival Island and some dryer lint, but I have and will continue to look for better prizes.* BUT beyond that, you also get your artistry judged by awesome people and all entries will be displayed here on the blarg and on Pinterest.

Examples from last year's contest:

by Kimberly Bowers

By Rhea Blackthorne

by Me!

*If you have any video game related prizes or gift cards that you are willing and able to donate to the cause, please let me know. I will plug the hell out of you for helping. Thanks!

First Secret Cupid Round-Up!

I am super proud and happy to officially report that our first ever Cheeseblarg exchange was a great success. I tried to plan in case of every eventuality, and there was only one (point five) emergencies to deal with, that I had already figured for, so taking care of it was pretty simple. I used a very simple method to chose partners- each person got the person directly under them in the sign up list, as long as they were from the same country AND from a different state. Texas was our most popular state so I moved people around to make sure that each match had someone who wasn't in their area, but otherwise, it just went down the line. The last person got the first person to sign up, which was me.

There were 34 participants in total, and I am fairly certain that no one died in the process (which is a measure I use to ascertain  the success of any venture I partake in... someone dies, it is a failure, but otherwise WIN! I suppose it is clear that I have yet to put together any human hunting teams or mass suicides).

Here is the gift I got from my long time friend, sometimes reader, and awesome exchange participant, Eric R., who is one of the funniest guys I know, and whose intellectual stick figure comics many years ago gave me an inkling that maybe I could do this too (he also was the only male in the exchange).

Peanut butter, honey and sea salt truffles from Compartes Chocolatier in Hollywood, CA. So tasty!

And here are some gifts and experiences of your fellow Cheeseblargians:

Had so much fun creating for this swap. I got spoiled rotten by my partner who sent me an amazing disproving chicken card and all the amazing supplies I received! The chocolates...didn't last long after the picture.                                         -Brandy Davis

I had a great time with the Secret Cupid exchange.

Husband and I have been together since high school (11 years), and we have only ever celebrated one Valentine’s Day – the first one.

I tend to poo-poo most holidays, I’m not a fan of Xmas, so much work and stress for so little reward, the only good thing about Easter is hot crossed buns, but I can just buy fruit loaf throughout the year, it’s almost the same thing, right? I’m Australian so Halloween is meaningless to me (I’m the lady that gives out apples if any kids come a knocking). So Valentine’s Day sits right up there with the rest. Ignored.  It was actually a lot of fun to join in the Cheeseblarg Secret Cupid.

The best part? – The grow your own Crocodile from an egg thing! BEST GIFT EVER! -Sarah H. 

I really enjoyed being part of this Secret Cupid Exchange. I got a lovely package with 4 bowls for me to use in my Bentos, as well as a map of San Antonio, and some packages of seeds. I loved the personalized pictures that my Secret Cupid drew on the bowls and the map. It really made me smile. I'd love to be included in a future exchange!    ~Kat

I'm sending a photo of what my secret cupid sent.

Unfortunately, I'm not sure who to give credit to, so maybe you could help me out on that piece. (It was Brandy up there *points* -JR)

It should be noted that I raise alpacas, which makes it even more fan-freakin-tastic that my valentine sent me a beautiful felted zipper pouch with an alpaca on it. Even better, she included a hand-drawn ACEO card with the alpaca from the pouch. I screamed and shouted, "Sweet!" when I opened my package, frightening my dogs in the process. It's so flipping cool, and I am so glad I participated.

 Really, it was exciting and fun even to be a sender of a package. It made valentine's day fun and exciting again. I haven't felt that way about it since elementary school. Would totally do this again (hint, hint).

I'm also including a picture of some of my herd, just for fun. (OMG SO CUTE! JR) 

Thanks again for coming up with this super sweet idea. -Britta

I was spoiled! Thank you to cherriesnchecks.blogspot.com! She actually sent me a handmade tiny manatee named earl, which is my dream. Seriously cool. -Eke 

And yeah, it was super fun and only a little stressful for me, because I wanted everyone to be happy (and had to send out 68 personalized emails). I'm almost glad that I didn't go with my original idea of giving everyone my address and pretending they all got me as valentines, such lucky readers. =P 

Hopefully, the rest of the participants will link their blog posts in the comments here so you can see everyone's posts, because Cheeseblargians are some of the best readers and present givers I have met in my ENTIRE life. You can also see more gifts and interact over at Cheeseblarg on Facebook!

Cheeseblarg's Secret Cupid Valentine Exchange!

(excerpt from chat conversation)

So I had an idea, while in the shower last night...
bathtub maybe...
In water
Not that it really maters where I was
The point is I had an idea.
And I am going to tell it to you.

Last year, I did a Valentine contest where one person got a Valentine package from me. And that was pretty boss, but since this was a hard year for me, I thought, giving one person love is just not enough, I want EVERYONE to have buckets of love, but alas, I don't have enough resources to send love to everyone, and then I splashed water everywhere. Not really, but you can imagine I did. I might have just gotten my hair wet in my excitement, if I am going to bother being honest.

A secret cupid exchange!

We, as a community of Cheeseblargians (including me), could come together and be each other's Valentines. I know way too many people who hate Valentine's day because they don't have someone who wants to regularly put their junk in said person's junk and that is just silly. I mean, junk merging is clearly enjoyable for most people who are into that sort of thing, but love does not just have to come from people who wanna stick their junk in you or otherwise come in contact with your parts. I have always enjoyed just sharing love and happy sappiness with anyone who doesn't put a restraining order on me, so how about it?

Uh, we be each other's Valentines without any junk dipping at all. We do it to make someone happy and to also, ourselves, feel happy about getting to make someone else happy.

• You sign up to be a Valentine using my handy dandy form (that is closed now, since it is past the deadline). 

• You are matched up with a person to whom you will send a Valentine package ($5 minimum, no maximum, but more than $25 should NOT be expected). The person you are sending to should not be the person you will get stuff from.

• You will be encouraged to give your blog address and to visit your match's blog to gently stalk them to get an idea of things they like. Please don't be creepy. And tell me if people are being creepy, so I can tell 'em to knock it off.

• January 30th is the last day to sign up (cutoff comes at midnight mountain time zone). I will send out matches on the 31st of January- 2nd of February (depending on how many matches we get). Packages should be sent by Wednesday, February 8th so that packages get there in time (unless you plan on sending express... just try make sure it gets there on time!).

• We have Cheeseblargians all over the world so I need matches not only in the US and Canada, but also in the UK and Australia. If you are from the US or Canada and are willing to do overseas gift exchanges and chance not having them ON Valentine's Day (especially if you already have a Valentine person of your own), be sure to check that option on the sign up page!

Important things to make this work:

• You will be getting emails from me. It is important that your email works and that it be an email you check regularly.

• Email me when you send your package out and I will email your match to let them know it was sent. If you have tracking information, that would be a good thing to send me.

• When you receive your gift, come back and tell us all about it either on Cheeseblarg's facebook page or on this post (link from your own blog)! Photos are encouraged. 

• Remember, this is about giving love so do be gracious, even if you get a Pee Wee Urine Bag (don't send Pee Wee Urine Bags, or otherwise troll your Valentine, please... even if this is a humor blarg, gifts are serious bidness!).

• If for some reason your package doesn't arrive after I sent you notice it was shipped, let me know after two weeks from when it should arrive and I will let the community know so that you can be sure to get a gift.

What are good Secret Cupid gifts?
Handmade or silly cards, something special and unique from your part of the country, something Cheeseblarg themed, candy, jewelry, toys, stickers, books, things you are sure your match will like.

What are BAD Secret Cupid gifts?
Anything harmful, stinky, or dead that has not been proccessed in a way that makes it an appropriate gift (leather wallet, ok- dead raccoon carcass, not ok). Something funny but dissapointing, something your match obviously wouldn't want (like a bag of flour for the writer of GlutenFreeForLife or A Vampire Hunter Taxadermied Duck for VeganGal417) This should be a pleasant experience for all.

If you know you cannot make the deadlines or can't send at least 5 dollars worth of something (plus shipping), hold off for another gift exchange, please. If you have an aversion to giving out your address or are in the Witness Protection Program, this is probably not for you. Also, if you are a jerk in a way that it will mar the experience for someone else, just be a jerk to someone in person and get it out of your system. Don't be mean to my people. The Cheeseblargians, I mean, not the Jews.



If for some reason, this becomes way more popular than I expect it to, and I get hundreds or thousands or BILLIONS of people wanting to participate, uh... I may need help or a little more time. I shall keep y'alls posted, in that case. 


And if I have missed something, glaringly, that is going to make this suck for me, or you guys, please let me know so I can fix it! 

The Bloggess Paper Dolls

So I was taking a shower, thinking like I do while in the shower when I run out of choruses from songs I don't really know. I had just been tooling around on Twitter and there was a stream of tweets from The Bloggess about "The Traveling Red Dress," at which time I went and looked at pictures of Jenny in the Traveling Red Dress and shortly after, my shower thoughts went to how I adore the many dress up pictures of The Bloggess. I wasn't looking at twitter in the shower, in case that was unclear. Though, my weasels, I would love to own a waterproof electronic internet-ready device so that I could interface with Skynet at all times... but I digress.
I thought, you know what would be awesome... uh, Bloggess Paper Dolls. Because, I mega heart paper dolls (as we should know from my many dress up games) and I really wanted to draw Wolf Blitzer as a paper doll outfit. And while I usually would make a flash game, I thought it would bring people more joy to do it old school with the added happy of getting to color the outfits. Coloring + Paper Dolls is almost as good as bacon and frosting (but not together... bacon and then a while later, frosting).

So I (we, because she did the kick ass border), give you:

Seriously, click to embiggen, print it out, color all the outfits, cut them out, take pictures of them being played with. Share them with the both of us. Make Copernicus choke the hell out of her (not because we don't like her, but well... read the post and you will understand I mean her no ill will).

If you can afford it, please go buy an official version from her store.  All profits go to charity, and charity is awesome!

And secret fact:  My earlier draft had a "Beyonce the Metal Chicken" costume for The Bloggess to wear, but it was too clunky and she just looked like she worked at El Pollo Tropical, so I switched to a stalking Beyonce instead.

Also, some of the tabs are completely useless and are there to amuse me. Just fold them out of the way.

I also cannot be sure I washed my hair while I was taking that shower because I was really lost in thought. I think I did, but what does it really matter.


--Edited to add--

Want your own paper doll? 

For the first 10 people, I will draw your figure (colored) and two fashion pieces and two accessories (not colored) like The Bloggess Paper Dolls  for $30.  After that it would be $45 for the same. If you want something different (or more) let me know by emailing me cheeseblarg at live dot com, and I will figure out a reasonable fee. I'll just need photos of the figure you want drawn and clothing/accessory idea photos. Half payment is due upfront to hold your place. Doll shall be delivered by email within 2 weeks (and often way sooner).

Nominate J Rose for a social media award in the Shorty Awards

Hanukkah 2011- 8th Night- From Us to You!

It's the last night of Hanukkah. Despite what calendars say, it is over now. Tomorrow is the last day, but Jews don't acknowledge days. We are like the vampires of the holiday world.
It has been a wild ride. You got some crappy gifts, I did too, but it was fun. Wasn't it? Okay, it wasn't terribly painful? Maybe a little? But the fun kind? Damn it, people!

Whatever, here is your stupid jerk gift.

(unwrap it... with the link below... or scroll... wow, this has been tedious telling people how to access a webpage...)

Charming Thanksgiving Fun

As I said last year, I like to terrorize my Thanksgiving guests and make them DO things before they can have their dinner.  Because I use up all my creativity drawing stupid pictures and joking about horrifying genres of porn, my staple torture device is "The Hand Turkey." If you are unfamiliar with the hand turkey tradition, you are either not American, were home-schooled, or may have some sort of memory disorder.  Basically, you trace your hand, and make the tracing into a turkey. Very complicated stuff.

I tried really hard to come up with more Thanksgiving crafts, but it took way more effort than I was willing to expend and I thought googling would be cheating. If you have any, especially if they are really awful (not goatse awful, please... although... no, not goatse awful) do let me know.  In the meantime, I created an easy set of print-outs so you can share my Thanksgiving traditions with your families.

Extra llama points if  you post a hand turkey on the FB page... just so you know!

Also, PLACE CARDS!  You have to have place cards at family dinners, because, a) you certainly cannot trust people to pick their own seats, and b) actually telling people where to sit is out of the question. You are already flustered enough trying to get everything out passive-aggressively hot so Aunt Beverly doesn't bitch that the potatoes are cold again this year, and if you have to repeat yourself at all, you may just stab a ho'.

I've included one for if your family has a sense of humor, and one to keep you from being disinherited. Just print it out on card stock, carefully cut along the blue border and write your guests' name in the blank area. Or something like that...



*if you don't know what Goaste is and you look it up, it is not my fault. I'm not kidding. Curiosity/Cat/Yadda. Eye Bleach does not exist.

Cheeseblarg's Halloween Scavenger Hunt

As promised, though it took every bit of my energy to do this (so you better participate, or no scavenger hunt, ONE YEAR) the SECOND OFFICIAL CHEESEBLARG SCAVENGER HUNT- of HALLOWEENESS!

Grand Prize- Trick or Treat package courtesy of  Southern Fried Children 
Second and Third place prize- Halloween Llama (your choice of costume- delivered by email)


Participation badge for everyone else!


Internet searches don't count towards personalized prizes. To participate, take photos of all of the hunt items below.

Upload your finished scavenger hunt as one image by using http://www.photovisi.com (or a similar collage application). The first person with the most images from the hunt, uploaded by November 5th will receive a Trick or Treat package from the darling and wonderful Kelly of Southern Fried Children who was kind enough to help me out since all of my money is still gone with no word on when it will come back. Winners two and three get personalize llama art from me. I will announce the winners on the 6th, at which point info will be collected to send out prizes.

You must post a link to your image HERE IN THE COMMENTS to be considered for a prize. HERE. IT MUST BE HERE. IN THE COMMENTS. ON THE BLARG. It doesn't count if it is NOT here....

And what must you find?

1. A cross dresser
2. Scary Jack-o-lantern 
3. Funny/Cute Jack-o-lantern
4. Bobbing for Apples
5. The jackass who stole all my money
6. Caramel Apple
7. Star Wars Character
8. Group of at least 4 people acting like zombies
9. A person dressed as food
10. Food dressed as a person
11. Pet in a costume
12. Bad treats being given out
13. Silliest slutty costume you can find
14. Strangest person NOT in costume
15. Best house decoration
16. A crying child
17. A spider
18. A vampire (sparkling or not)
19. A person dressed as a farm animal
20. Harry Potter Character
21. Werewolf Attack
22. An Angry Bird
23. A graveyard
24. The BEST treat
25. A ghost
26. Current event costume
27. Inappropriate child costume
28. A Hunka Hunka Burning Love
29. A Skeleton
30. A child dressed as a waffle iron (this was my mom's suggestion and may give you some insight into what is wrong with me) - or a TRICK
31. Llama OR Narwhal

Good luck, happy hunting, and happy Halloween!

Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day, Ya Salty Curs!

Arr!

There be play sets ahead! 

Modeled here by Sarah's mug, from A Blogful of Boredom

Winner, winner llama dinner.

I was quite pleased with the turnout on our first Scavenger Hunt, in that there was actually a turnout, and there were more than six entries.

Our top three winners, who actually left their houses to find all the items and/or interacted with other humans:


Ten Blue Stars
Kim (who inspired the hunt to begin with!)
Niamh

Lady-people, please send your mailing address to cheeseblarg at live dot com and I will get that envelope of happiness out to you by the end of the week.

And the next three, who had a mix of googling and human interaction are:


Sarah
Ms. MM
Bonnie

I loved your creative pictures and senses of humor in fulfilling my list. Thank you! Here are your personalized badges!

And to all the other people who have turned in their hunt finds, and who are still working on it, here is your badge.  It is on the honor system, but I will totally be mean to you if I find that you are using it without having  joined the llama games.

Please, go look at everyone's hunt results. They all did a great job.

As far as future scavenger hunts, I was thinking a Halloween Hunt might be lots of fun-- that is, that has to be done ON Halloween.  What do you think?

Cheeseblarg's First Official Scavenger Hunt

I was talking to my friend, Kim, because she's awesome, but also because she has been having a crap-filled couple of days, not literally, at least I don't think so, but stressful as all get out, and she suggested that she needed to get out of the house to clear her mind.  Being the awesome and creative friend I am, I offered to create a scavenger hunt for her, because adventures are more exciting than moping in public. But then, the point of scavenger hunts, as I understand them, is to have competition, so that is where you guys come in.

While you could go the cheaty route and just google crap (especially if you are stuck in an office building and aren't allowed to leave your cubicle because you are chained to it until the whistle blows-- yeah, I have never actually worked in an office setting so I imagine that is how it works, right?) there are some items that will require actual photos, and really, actually taking the pictures yourself is more fun... but if you do google, against my will, it better be super creative.

Photo sets can be uploaded to http://www.flickr.com/groups/cheeseblarghunt with a link to your images in a comment here.  You can also, alternatively, upload your images to a post on your own blog and paste a link in the comment section.

Prizes
First 3 people to post completed hunts (that are not googled/binged/searched for on the internet and show that you actually left the house to do it), win an envelope of happiness from me in the mail.

Next 3 people to post completed hunts win a special personalized scavenger hunt winner badge.
And since only six people actually read this regularly, that should cover it.

No, no, all others will receive a scavenger hunt badge for their blog, or wall, or refrigerator.

Winners will be announced in a separate post and I will request addresses at that time to send out prizes.


Now, on to the hunt!

Remember, you can be as creative as you like, as long as one could reasonable associate your photo with the item on the list.


1. A cat in a window
2. Bare feet in grass
3. Bacon
4. A squeaker
5. 3 people holding cards
6. Cheese on an entire family
7. Someone wearing a hat
8. A bird, not in a tree
9. The color red, only the color red
10. You holding a sign referring to Da Cheeseblarg
11. The cutest chocolate you can find
12. Velcro
13. An upside down book
14. Something I write about all the time but have not put in the list
15. Ice cream
16. A chance
17. Something nerdy
18. A yellow flower
19. A crack in a sidewalk
20. The inside of a grocery store
21. A person wearing a barrette
22. A scavenger

I will also accept drawings/painting for each item, but they must be done by you, and stick figures don't count!

Do you want to party? It's party time!

It's been suggested, in the comments of the last post, that I have an "It's not a tumor" party.  Thankfully I was given the suggestion of having a make-believe one, because my friends only exist on the internet (that is, spread across the country and the world, and a portion of them don't even have internet access at the moment... I have friends, damn it! *sobs*). So, make-believe party it is.  You are all invited; it is a pot-luck.

I DON'T HAVE A BRAIN TUMOR!

Don't disappoint.

And don't forget, just a few more days left to get your Narwhal stickers! 

Narwhal Dress-Up!

My friend asked me to tell her how to make a dress-up game for her blog this afternoon, and in order to do that, I had to walk myself through the process again, so, OMG! You guys get another dress-up game from me.  Remember, you can share your creations by pressing the print screen (or prt sc) key on your keyboard and then pasting into a paint program. Just upload them to the Facebook Fan Page (or you own host) to share them with me and the other Cheeseblargians (that is what you are called, by the way... now you know, and knowing is have the battle! GO JOE!).

Have fun!

Don't get fired!

ETA: In case you're confused, you can drag and drop the different clothes and accessories onto the narwhal.
AND If you can't get enough weird animal dress-up, there is the Llama Dress-Up over here! 

Comment Marauder

It has been pointed out to me that I am strange in my habit of reading comments on other people's postings.  I do this for pieces of art, blog posts, videos, facebook pages... pretty much anywhere someone posts something to solicit comments, I am going to read the comments.  To me, the reason for sharing things on the internet is to interact with other people and as such, the interaction is part of the experience.

The response that I get when I tell people this is usually, "Well, I read my comments!"

Yes, I read your comments too. I want to hear what people say about things that I take the time to read, for the most part. Comments are really interesting, often funny.  There are whole websites dedicated to seeing people's replies (for Facebook, at least).  So yes, usually, I click and read everything that everyone says to my friends.  I even go back when I have nothing better to do and check if there are more comments.

Okay, fine, maybe I am just a creepy stalker...

And hey guys, my friend, Pat, is looking for support for a short movie he is trying to make.  If you would be interested in helping out a beginning director with his horror movie, please check out this link.

Picture pages, pictures pages, time to get your picture pages...

Aww, you guys! There are over 700 of you who actually allow yourselves to be seen in public with me now! Thank you! Without you, I would just be pathetically drawing silly pictures and writing to myself.

Here is your prize for coming on board the Cheeseblarg train. Wait, train? Wagon? No, no, this is a modern type of blarg, let's go with monorail. Yes, monorail of cheesedom.
Sorry, I'm tired, my smoke alarm went off at 4 am for no reason and I had taken a benadryl, and now I am awake this early for no reason, so... more rambly than usual.

Ah, yes, your prize.  Coloring pages! Everyone loves coloring pages, and you have 3 to choose from.  You can either post links to your colored pictures here (please make clickable links using "a href" html) or upload them over on the Facebook fan page (where I am actually much more likely to respond to people personally because the format is easier than here).  I may post some of the best/most amusing ones. Just click on the pictures below then right click to save, so that you can color them on your computer, or print them out to color by hand.

Happy coloring!

Llamapocalypse                                            Whale Wonderland                                     Unicorn Carpools

Cheeseblarg's Llama Dress Up!

Sweet weasels, I should have taped myself creating this because I probably could have won some sort of prize for yelling and cursing nonsensically at my computer. But it is done, and uploaded, and it is all for you... and it was also for me, because the parts where I was not cursing and yelling and wishing everyone in the world dead, were actually pretty fun.

For the record, this was my first time doing Flash, ever.  And I had to figure out how to use it myself, because the tutorials I found didn't use the version I was using, which is apparently completely different. But now that I know how to do it, I could probably be encouraged to do more sometime. *nudge*
Let me know how you like it, and tell a friend to come play!

GHA! Hold tight if it isn't working for you. It seems to load every other time. I am working on other hosting. ETA: Hooray! Changed hosting, working now! Thanks Luc and Caz!